The Cast

    Age: 29
Occupation: Internet pornography database programmer
Ethnicity: Miscellaneous European mix
Relationship Status: Has lived with Vara, his signifcant other, for several years.
Self-Image: A self-described "bleeding-heart liberal", Yiff is a sensitive guy with a penchant for the bizarre.

    Age: 25
Occupation: Oceanographer
Ethnicity: Eastern European
Celebrity He Most Resembles: Sun Tzu
Favorite Makeout Music: The Conet project, CDs 1, 2, & 4
Relationship Status: confusing
Outlook on life: Anti-authoritarian, confrontational, Merkin has a love of bad puns, which he considers the pinnacle of humor.

Ted Strawman
    Age: Uncertain
Occupation: Damned soul and right-wing idealogue.
Former Occupation: Capitalist Tool
Net Worth: Not as much as it was when he was alive.
Ethnicity: Straw and dried alfalfa.
Outlook: Capitalist.

William Barnhill
    Age: Was 34 at his death in 1411 AD
Occupation: Infernal tour guide
Vices: Stealing hands
Corporeal Status: Fuzzy
Ethnicity: Hard to say.
Outlook: More cheerful than the average damned soul.

    Age: 28
Occupation: Student / geek girl
Ethnicity: Wild Irish Lassie
Sanity level: Wildly fluctuating
Hobbies: Animation, video games, messing with people's heads.
Relationship Status: Has lived with Yiff, her signifcant other, for several years.
General demeanor: Tomboy with a crazy streak

    A gimmick character that's gonna net this comic millions in sales of stuffed toys and t-shirts.

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